Year One: Ferociously Blessed (2013.11.10)

Standard

With the news about Las Vegas today, my heart is hanging heavy. I will be spending a lot of time praying and finding out the best way to help these people. When something like this happens it is always frightening, it is scary and it is awful to hear, it happening in my own state was a bit of a wake up call.

Take something away from the news today though, our lives are so short. We don’t know how much sand is left in our own hourglass so make sure to tell those you love that you love them. Don’t let a second go past with fear or hate in your heart. If you do, people like the terrorist who did this will win.

We won’t let them win. I promise you that. I’ll be fighting every day, with love as a weapon.

I love what I do. To be honest, it is my favorite thing in the world. I have this incredible opportunity in front of me with my clothing company and my writing and all of that. It floors me sometimes. I realize that not many people get to say what I just said, there are so many people who get up and go to work and go home and go to bed and get up and go to work and so on and so on… I don’t get to do that and I am so grateful for the opportunity.

Writing is my passion, above everything else, and besides writing, I get to draw, and sing, and play instruments, and live this beautiful life what with its little hurdles. I am so ferociously blessed, that I can’t often comprehend. I have just spent the last three days working with one of my best friends in the world on my passion, and we have spent the last two days doing photo shoots with a beautiful girl, who happily represented my company. We even have another model lined up to shoot tomorrow. When people told me that this was going to be hard work, I agreed, because I knew that it was going to be hard work day in and day out. The thing they didn’t say though, which happens to be the most important thing, is that I absolutely love doing what I do. Meeting new people, getting the opportunities to make new friends and talk to artists and expand my view of the world.

Who gives a rat’s balls what you do with your life? It is your life. Do whatever makes you happy, that’s what I’m doing, and let me tell you honestly. I love every second of it. If you are sitting at home or in a coffee shop reading this, and maybe question what you want to do with your life, I have only one thing to tell you.

Do whatever the hell you want to.

As I type this, I am sitting less than ten feet away from one of my best friends who probably is doing the same thing that I am doing. Typing up a blog about our weekend. And this? This is work. Can you believe it? Every single thing I do is work to me, and I love doing it. If you hate your job, and can’t find a good reason to get up and do it every day, I hope that you find out what will make you feel like this soon. Because I want every single person in the world to feel how I feel right now. I am ecstatic about life, friends, the ability to be creative, Anxious about my future, but still completely calm at the same time and to be truthful, just a little bit exhausted from all of the nothing it has felt like we’ve done this weekend. Even though it has felt like we have done nothing, We both have accomplished so much.

This trip hit my life at the same time that some emotional turbulence did, but I am so thankful for it, because it got me away, it got me to sit down in a whole different reality and look at my life. Right now I am living a story, and somewhere along the line I think I forgot that.

I remember now, though.

In some small way, it feels like the story to a book, like a real book. The Hobbit, or Harry Potter, I don’t know. Maybe somewhere out there, there is a room just full of old dudes, who constantly watch a certain group of people, and write out every single thing that they do. they would put them chronologically and arrange them into a story, bind the pages with some leather and store them away when they die. There would be millions of these dudes, just sitting in buildings on the highest peaks of the Earth, or the deepest levels of the sea in little huts. What if at the end of our lives we get that book? It would be considered a great value on Earth, it took nearly 80 years to write and it’s full of a lifetime of stories. I believe that there is something like that out there maybe. I have no way of knowing for sure… All I know right now is that someone out there is ready to hear my story. I want to make sure that when I meet that Person, I hope to have a good one, because I am ready to tell it.

 

It’s adventure time.

If you liked this blog post, consider picking up the compilation and giving the rest of them a read! I’d appreciate it so much. You can find them on my website as well as Amazon.

October is always a big month, I’ll be rearranging the blog and my webpage a bit as the days go by + I have cool stuff on the way soon! I love all of you. Spooky Saturday will be returning this weekend + I’ll be managing my YouTube channel a bit better, participating in NaNoWriMo + more. For updates, check out the S+I website. 🙂

www.linmtba.com

Our Ribs Are Cages (Year One 2014.2.28)

Standard

I woke up earlier than I anticipated this morning, which was probably the world’s way of telling me I’ve been sleeping too much. I woke up and rolled around on my bed fighting off the urge to go back to sleep, trying to convince myself that I could just stay in this not asleep, not awake limbo. It only lasted for a while. I decided that it was pointless to try and fight it, so I rolled off of my bed and started the day against my will. This morning I found out that last night after I got back from my errands, I drank sour milk without realizing it, I’m almost out of toothpaste and then my eye started hurting. Two years ago, that would have been enough things that had gone wrong that my day would have started off on the wrong foot and I would’ve let myself complain the whole rest of the day.

Not anymore.

I don’t believe that I have anything to complain about, period. No matter how bad things get, I was blessed with an incredible life. If I happen to die after posting this blog I think it would be an appropriate last one. I want them all to be good “last” posts, because I can’t guarantee life. I can only live the best one that I know how. I want to impart the things I know to others. While it isn’t much, I know how to live a good life. Its something I have been working on for a while, because I think its important.

People have fought over this for years, trying to justify it with religious ideas, or spiritual ideas. People have called it a lot of different things, and they have ignored it in the vast majority. They’ve put slogans on T-shirts and coffee mugs, and posters in downtown New York City. It’s simple really, the secret to a happy life is to love people. Love them regardless of their faults, and the things that bother you about them. Just love them, that’s all the matters in the end. I want to do that. I try really hard to do that, too. I think so at least.

People act like life is this huge mystery and we have to spend our days trying to figure out why we’re here. I think that we are here to love people. That’s all. Beyond any religious, or spiritual or scientific idea I have, I think that loving each other is our whole purpose in life. I mean really loving them though, not like a performer “Oh, come out tonight and show me love.”, or a person overusing its meaningfulness to make it meaningless. “Oh I love her/him. They’re great.” “I love the way the rain smells.” I won’t lie and pretend that I don’t use love in ways that I shouldn’t. I just love. That’s what I want to do,

Love is what makes me happy.

 

That being said, I’ve given you the secret to life. This whole crazy existence that springs up and grows and dies all around us is beautiful, and if for one second you don’t notice it, millions of blessings slip right between your fingers. It is love. Love is so much more than a feeling, or a verb. It is a real, almost tangible thing. When you look, you can see it. You can feel it inside your very bones.

 

It shakes you.

Truly loving anything will shake you to the core. It might terrify you. It might not. There is a good chance that truly loving anything is the most dangerous thing that you can do. It exposes you. So many people only truly let themselves love a handful of things throughout their whole lives and not to make it sound bad but I don’t want to live that way. When you love a lot, you get used to your bones rattling and after a while, love rattling your bones doesn’t scare you anymore.

 

There is a picture that I found on the internet that says “Our ribs are cages, because our hearts are wild.” and I find this easy to believe. Everyone knows that love as an emotion comes from your brain, but love as a lifestyle comes from somewhere within your soul. It is this powerful wave of emotion, and feeling, and action. It is almost impossible to explain. That is the very nature of love.

 

It turns pain into glory.

It turns weakness into strength.

It turns fear into excitement, and all of this into love.

It is one of the only things in the world that multiplies itself like that.

Love has the power to turn bone rattling earthquakes into comfort.

 

If you are one of the people who tells me “I can’t be happy with life like you are.” or maybe, “I don’t understand how you can act like you do all the time.” This is why. It is because I love, with every cell in my body I want to love.

 

I say I love everything, and I do. I try to at least, I think that it’s important. Love is important, it is the thing that holds this whole universe together. It keeps us from spiraling into madness and allows us the privilege of knowing one another. Every person I have met in life has been a mix of good and bad things. When we love them, it makes the terrible things they have done, or that have happened to them seem a little less terrible.

 

If you feel alone right now, like you just can’t go any farther, or that you’ve already given everything you have to give… I’m here to tell you that you’re far from done. You have a whole life to lead, and you are getting close to the end. It doesn’t matter how old you are, or what shape your body is in. Your life is happening, right now. I don’t want anybody reading this to waste another second of their time doing anything but loving other people. You don’t know when they will be gone, you don’t know when you will be gone. So take the time right now, to call those that you already love and let them know.

 

So right now, stop letting yourself believe that you don’t have a say. Stop letting the ground shake around you and terrify you. Life is yours to live. So rattle your bones and love, with everything you have. Love until your skeleton dances along with all of the tremors that life gives you.

I hope you enjoyed this peek back to the past, if you did, consider picking up my Life is not Meant to be Awful Vol. 1 compilation featuring this + many of my other blog posts!

Amazon

Random Acts Creations

Pretending We Are Atlas – 2013.9.7

Standard

This was the second blog post I had published back in September of ’13. I look back on this moment fondly, it is so easy to slip up on the things we commit ourselves to. If it were easy to be this kind of person every day, we wouldn’t make those kinds of commitments, would we?

If you are carrying a weight today, read on. See what I saw four years ago. I hope it kicks you in the ass like it did to me.

This week was hectic for me. I started working at an old job, while working for the one I currently am. I would get home at around 10 p.m. and then go out to sweep parking lots for a few hours at midnight. I’d get home from that at about four and then go to bed, which I would have to get up the next day at ten. It might not seem like much, but with all of the other stuff that was going on, I was losing my mind. My stomach just felt like a big ball of stress, and I didn’t know what to do about it. I had so much to get done, and less than no time to do it. After I added in visiting my kitten, and making sure I had enough sleep to properly operate the sweeper that night, I had about two hours to; Write a chapter in a novel, organize a story-line for a new story, do a ‘final draft’ (For lack of better words.) on a collection of songs I plan on releasing, and five or six other things on my daily to do list. I literally couldn’t finish anything past the first item on any given day.

My week was hell, in short. Maybe it wouldn’t be for some people, but it felt like it to me. And that is when I realized something: In Greek mythology, there was a titan named Atlas. His job was to literally hold the sky. He stood every single day with it on his back. I personally think that the sky couldn’t be that heavy. It’s just air, right?

That is my point.

Every person you meet in your life, has something that is proving to be a burden for them. Even if it is small, it might really matter to them. Maybe they had money stolen, or have an important meeting in their job, or just destroyed the pool table at their favorite bar after a fight. no one really knows, and it occurred to me that when I started looking at things this way, my problems didn’t seem so bad. I started looking around and seeing all these broken pool table fellows, and victims of theft when they really needed money, and it hit home that I was basically complaining because I was getting less sleep than I wanted.

Sometimes I think that people do that when they don’t mean to. We think we are the most important just because our problem is annoying us more than anything else. After I realized that my only problem was that I wasn’t as rested as I’d like to be, I mostly got over it. (It helped that I was with my best friend and we were talking and laughing.) Through all of my day yesterday, the ups and downs, I also realized something that is really important to me.

I haven’t helped anyone in a long time.

When I help people, it makes me feel so much better about everything. My problems don’t look, or feel nearly as big when I’m focusing on somebody else. In the end, I kind of think that the reason I got so stressed is because I have spent so much time thinking about me, my problems and my needs. I spent no time thinking about what the people around me are in need of.

I spend a lot of time pretending I’m Atlas. I carry my whole sky on my shoulders. It would do me well to set it down once a while and help lighten someone else’s burdens. If you are anything like me at all, I hope this reaches you.

Life is not meant to be awful.

Thank you for the first of many walks down memory lane. I hope to spend a grand time here, for as long as we need it.

If you liked this post + are new to my blog, consider picking up Volume One of the “Life is not Meant to be Awful” Compilation, you can find Pretending We Are Atlas and many more within the pages!