I realized this weekend that I wasn’t taking things in my life very seriously. Sure, I talk about the blog and about my books more than anything else, but they moved from these big life altering projects to being these warm safety blankets. I stopped experimenting. I stopped, if only for a moment, believing in what I’m doing here. Things got dark and I got scared.
I’m not scared anymore. I won’t let myself be scared again.
Summer is coming to a close soon in Elko, in a month and some change our roads will be covered in leaves. Our trees will be giving life to the earth and the winter wind will prepare to waltz through our town. It is my favorite time of year. It is the time when I am most productive. It is time that I have personally set aside to work on this business and myself. I revel in the chilly nights of October and November. The feeling of family gatherings growing closer. The spooky air that hovers around October like a coming storm.
In a lot of ways, it is the beginning of the end of the day that is 2016.
This year has been so many things. So many lows and even more highs. I feel as if I haven’t had time to rest since it started. There has always been writing to do, books to edit, plans to finish. Yet, I wouldn’t trade the experiences from this for anything in the world. It has reminded me of so many things. How strong humans can be when we are pushed into corners. How passionate we are. How loving and kind we can be if we simply allow ourselves to be so.
We still have a good four months to go, and that’s okay. The following months will be better. They will be better because we have learned. We have gained an armor of kindness. We have been able to celebrate our love in so many ways this year. Through sorrow, through joy, through doldrums and through hurricanes.
We are still here, and we are still up to the task of living another day. There is no greater gift than that, I think.
I look forward to tomorrows.
Especially the tomorrow that follows sunset on the beach. There is nothing quite like it. Something about the pink glow on top of the water says to me that things are about to turn around. It stands as an incandescent testament that this world is mine.
That this world is ours.
That we lived through some of the worst and some of the best. That we will always have a second chance, as long as we are willing to take it.
As the sun sets for you this year, I hope that you look at the sunset too.
I hope you find a second wind. I hope you find a hurricane inside of your heart that drives you to the all-powerful madness of love.
I hope you have something worth fighting for. I hope you have a reason to wake up tomorrow.
If not, then lets create one together.
I love all of you. Thank you, for everything.
Life is not meant to be awful.
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